Charly Boy (Twitter: @Areafada1)
Last week as I stayed glued to CNN because of the forthcoming American election. I saw a mini documentary on weddings, the Naija style. I must say that from time, we do know how to put on a show, especially my brothers from the west.
We as Africans are generally boisterous people. We love events, and for us everything is a large party. The larger the party, the more successful an occasion is interpreted to be. Naming ceremonies, weddings, even funerals have become one big jamboree and my personal opinion is that we are losing the significance of these occasions which are meant to be solemn by the noisy chaos we have around it. I am particularly going to focus on weddings.
Several months ago, my last son came to me to talk about his impending marriage and of course the wedding planning came up. He was expecting to have a high society wedding at my expense (Hmmm see jobbing) but I told the young lad that it is whatever he can save for his wedding that will be the budget for it. Nobody paid for mine so he has to be disciplined enough to raise the money he needs for his.
Of course as an entertainer and a showbiz personality it is easy to surmise that I will like large occasions as witnessed during my late father’s burial which was a carnival of sort, but I still think that most of what we spend is unnecessary. Let me begin by saying that in modern days, the ceremony of weddings has become more important than the marriage act itself. Which is why we find the fragile institution of marriage collapsing.
I’ll have to say to some certain degree that elaborate functions are not always a bad idea especially when the person hosting it is spending money as a result of their hard work and not stolen or borrowed money.
It is normal for people to show off and have elaborate and flamboyant ceremonies. That’s one of the factors that differentiate us from animals. I also believe that simple is beautiful, but some occasions call for an elaborate celebration especially when it’s a once in a life time event. What better way to make the moment memorable than to make it elegant. However, what I find most worrisome is that some people go as far as borrowing money from the banks, other financial institutions, friends and family members just to celebrate weddings, burials and birthday parties. The most upsetting part is that after the show is over, then you still see them long after, struggling to meet up with the basic daily requirements of living? Why can’t they have a business plan in which they can invest that money and get returns or something more profitable?
One of my favourite sayings is, “cut your coat according to your size not your neighbour’s size”. Why must one go borrowing just to impress people when the aftermath of the ceremony leaves you in debt especially at the point where you have to start to think of someone else in regards to raising a family?
My advice to young people is that it’s not how expensive your occasion is that guarantees a stable married life. Instead of spending such a huge amount to have an elaborate wedding and when the debts pile up, the quarrels will begin; the advice I give young couples is that they should have a long financial discussion before marriage. Issues like who pays what bills and when should be addressed. One of the major conflicts people have in marriages is always financially related so it is very important to have this talk about the kind of financial future they want to have and strategise on how they intend to achieve it.
Abi wetin you think?
Saying NO to corruption
Corruption is the biggest cancer that collectively robs us as a society therefore the campaign against it requires the participation of all citizens and the stakeholders in the society. Because corruption in our society denies you and me of our basic rights, the fight against corruption should be a collaborative effort between the citizenry and the government.
It is based on this collaborative effort that the National Anti-Corruption Volunteers Corps (NAVC) was established the by Independent Corruption Practices and Other Related Offenses Commission (ICPC) in 2008 to bring the fight against corruption to the doorstep of every Nigerian.
Research has also shown that the campaign against corruption achieves greater success if it is owned and driven by the citizens because they are the ones most affected by the effects of corruption in their society.
I stand for good judgment, I stand for equity. Let’s reclaim the glory of our nation by saying NO to corruption in every sector. Together we can, we can’t wait for the government to do this entirely for us.
NAVC has released new operational guideline that will strengthen the citizens to fight this great cancer and one of its first implementation plan is to have NAVC driven by only respectable Nigerians of proven integrity register as members who will aid in restoring and executing the noble objectives of the corps with a view of achieving the vision of the Commission towards a corruption free Nigeria.
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