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The licence to be attractive has been granted to all people by nature. It helps to draw people to you and your cause; helpers, detractors and those in need of help. The Christmas tree is an epitome of attractiveness. It stands tall in its own space from where it glisters with magical lights and at its base are promises of pleasures untold namely boxed gifts, all brightly coloured and scheduled to be opened on Christmas morning. The base of the tree gives hope that what is longed for will finally come. The presents with their mysterious contents will be revealed on Christmas morning.
The Christmas tree also speaks of something higher than mere brightness and showiness. God’s child has been sent to the world to save the world. What the tree represents is a celebration of the mother of all gifts; the gift of God’s Son to the world.
So in summary, dressing like a Christmas tree alone is not enough to be attractive. Is there any promise? Is there a representation of something higher? Is hope dispensed out or is it plain old glister that fades? The Christmas tree is obsolete on Boxing Day but what it represents abides forever.
Men and women strive for attractiveness daily. They wear make- up, hair attachments and bright colours sometimes enough to even rival the Christmas tree.
Some people are born physically beautiful and that is just the way it is. Physical beauty is such an emotive subject for many, and these people walk around with a ‘beauty counter’ in their brains. They relate to every single human being they meet on the basis of who is more beautiful. These are those who recall people they met whose names they have forgotten by saying, “the very pretty girl dressed in black”. Others rate people they met by who is richer, taller or better spoken. The minute qualities start being judged and compared, a competitive mind-set develops. Soon gifted people around start to be seen as threats and rivals and nasty things are said.
We can all learn from the Christmas tree. It represents one thing and is not in competition with anything else. It offers promise and hope.
Have you ever met someone who looked attractive and you walked over to them for a chat and they dashed all the ‘hopes’ you had of a meaningful conversation? Looking good is not enough.
Think of the top 10 people you know very well. What comes to mind when their names are mentioned? The beauty of their smile or the character they possess? Over the years I have come to realise that people’s actions overshadow how they look. We never store information about people based on looks in real life. In social media where we all act and pretend, how things look becomes important, but in real life, silicon implants change nothing about the way we feel about anyone.
There are people I am drawn to when I see them on TV. And it is usually for what they represent and the hope that they inspire. I have bought books based on the fact that their faces or names were on the cover. Chinua Achebe (Late) and Barack Obama are two of such inspirational figures to me. I have never met them before yet they are attractive personalities and through their books and speeches I learn important things. The size of their estates, or the quality of their suits could not make me esteem them higher than I have already.
Rather than striving for the latest fashion to appear attractive, self- development is the key for longevity in the attraction department. Some people will produce attractive products and achieve relevance. Some people have the brains to develop companies that will solve problems. Whatever is done well and makes you sought after is your personal magnet; that is being attractive.
There are so many routes to the destination of attractiveness as there are different peoples and different destinies. Dressing half naked sure does draw attention but only for a few seconds. Lasting relevance is hard to achieve and takes a lot of work. It requires the answering of the questions: What is my purpose on earth and what talents do I possess to achieve my destiny?
Copying what people in the limelight do will never make you attractive to any major award bestowing bodies. There is no Nobel Prize for Twerking!
Short cuts to attractiveness
Manipulating social media can make you known. Deliberately being provocative without a cause is entertaining for a while however there is always someone more ‘Kamikaze’ who will take your spot.
Secret unattractiveness behind attractiveness
Behind every well cut diamond is a party of miners a few hundred feet under the earth slaving away.
Behind every fit body with well-defined muscles are a lot of hours in the gym sweating. No one looks good in the gym. Grunting with frightening facial expressions, people lift weights while smelling of sweat and expelling dangerous farts.
It is quite rare to achieve major attractiveness without getting your hands dirty. The biggest con of all is the cute mother and new born child picture conspiracy. This is what cons young girls into being mothers. If they really knew why that place is called labour ward, attitudes will change. During my obstetric residency I spent a lot of time on the labour ward and none of the mothers looked attractive. They screamed like that girl in the exorcist movie and didn’t care much how they sounded. However once the baby comes out and the blood and stuff is cleaned off, back on the ward the professional photographers go around photographing the babies. Those who don’t know feel broody on seeing the cute pictures while those who know hastily cross their legs.
So there it is, look attractive, be attractive and offer some form of hope and inspiration to your onlookers.