First Gentleman with Wilson Orhiunu
Email: babawill2000@gmail.com Twitter: @Babawilly
WhatsApp Groups are places where members share content. We are in the information age after all, so this was bound to happen. Man is a social animal and birds of a feather will flock, mock and rock together.
With an estimated two billion smartphones on the planet and one billion WhatsApp active users, quite a good section of cyber world are members of WhatsApp groups. Work partners, family, religious and alumni groups; every kind of interest has its own group.
If cyber space was a planet then WhatsApp is a continent. One without geographical boundaries; just small groups bound together by common interests and backgrounds. In this terrain, Jan Koum who hails from Ukraine and moved to the USA would have to be called Caesar for he founded WhatsApp in February 2009 with co-founder Brian Acton. This messaging App is used by people in over 180 countries and helps people stay connected at all hours. Jan Koum’s story of an immigrant to the USA who has made it easy for all immigrants worldwide to stay in touch with family is quite marvellous as is Facebook’s acquisition of WhatsApp for $ 19 billion in February 2014 (Everything WhatsApp related happens in February it seems).
WhatsApp groups are interesting places. The dynamics of human interactions with time produces patterns. Unlike in Facebook groups where membership could reach up to a million, WhatsApp groups are cosy affairs where the status quo is established very quickly.
In a group, the ultimate power belongs to the admin. He or she could add or remove a group member. Despite lacking the Jan Koum Caesar like powers, admin is a regional Oba (king) and needs to be given due respect.
Group members fall into two extremes.
Silent members who never post or comment on anything.
The trigger-happy folks who post incessantly, reply every post and comment on every comment. Their comments are not linked to any specialist knowledge they might have but more a compulsive reaction to the notifications from their phone.
Most other members however fall somewhere in the middle of this spectrum of WhatsApp activity. The average ‘normal’ group members tend to observe group etiquette. They never swear or abuse other members and they do not use the group platform to discuss personal matters with another member which is of no interest to the whole group. They might have a bias towards some kinds of topics but generally comment on most things.
Active members of groups have various characteristics and traits. Here are some of them:
Member absent-minded: He is in the group for the fun of it. They never pay close attention to what is said or what videos are put up. They show themselves up by asking questions that have been thoroughly trashed out the week before
Member CNN: This member feels the need to post news on the hour every hour. They serve up old news, breaking news and fake news. When challenged on their fake news habit, they reply by saying they thought it was fake anyway. The question is why post something you suspected was fake in the first place?
Member pet hate: This is the member only interested in sharing what they hate. It might be a boxer, a businessman, a politician or religious leader. The earth does not move for them unless they vent about what they hate. Whatever happened to love making the world go round?
Member sarcastic: When WhatsApp warns you that they are typing, you roll your eyes in anticipation of the soul-destroying comment on its way. Then you say a prayer of gratitude that you don’t have to live with them!
Member irrelevant information: This member shocks you with talking about the World War 2 in the middle of a debate about who is the greatest wrestler in the WWE. Everywhere goes silent as no one knows what to say next and the train of thoughts and fun is all but destroyed.
Member psychotherapist: This member has the answers to all personal problems and will promise to contact you personally to offer support. They care for everyone’s health and financial situation. They wire cash to members who are falling on hard times and still manage to respect the dignity of the one they are helping.
Member organiser: This is the ‘parent’ of the group. When all the talk is done, she makes concrete plans for meeting up for she knows left to the talkers and jokers nothing will get done.
Member joker: Everything is a joke for this member. They make you laugh and see the light side of things.
Member antagonist: No matter what comes up, they split the group into two camps. They wait for you to take a side then they occupy the opposing side and start arguing. Peace and harmony gives them allergic reactions.
Member positive vibration: They infuriate you when you just want to have a nice big fat negative vent and they would not let you be. These are the ones who have been reading Norman Vincent Peale from nursery school and quote their positive sound bites ad nauseum.
Member anti-spell check/Morse code enthusiast: They will never read over what they have written before posting and you get headaches trying to decipher what they have written.
Member I too know: Knows too much and is opinionated on every topic. Equally loved and loathed.
Member narcissist: Never one to pass up on an opportunity for a nice selfie, (hourly) they post pictures of themselves on the group all the time. They think they look good and dress well and so does everybody else only not one wants to see their smug face hourly.
Member fitness fanatic: At the gym, on a run, lifting weights, it is the same every day. Pictures with the t-shirt pulled up to showcase a nice set of abdominals. Some call them show-offs while others call them inspirational exercise addicts.
Member disk jockey aka member YouTube: Needs no introduction.
Member paranoid and vindictive- This member believes every post is an attack on them so they react. They have the recall of an elephant and might tie a post or comment to what happened previously; that Saturday night 25 years ago. Carly Simon sang it well. They probably think this article is about them. Not vain, just plain paranoid. Due to perceived insult dispensed years ago, they wait for their perceived enemy to post something and attack via commenting with all guns blazing. Then the Jan Koum’s designated local representative, the admin, steps in.
Disclaimer
Any similarities with Dr Wilson Orhiunu noticed by members of WhatsApp groups I belong to are purely coincidental
