First Gentleman with Wilson Orhiunu
Email: babawill2000@gmail.com Twitter: @Babawilly
The ones you go crying to when it goes horribly wrong should be the first you go dancing to when it goes splendidly well. But it does not always happen this way because folks forget the shoulders they cried on when they could not see a way out. Once the light at the end of the tunnel gets brighter then they realise they have suppressed their dreams for years and it is now time to go and make things happen. Brighter and better things do not include the encouragers, the nurturers and the zero-percentage loan dispensers.
There are just two words for this, Ingratitude and Devaluation.
Ingratitude is all about not saying thank you to the source of favour. This cannot be done without a devaluation of what the source did in the darkest hour. For instance, the hungry asks for money for a plate of food and come pay day, goes out to experience fine dining with friends – other friends while the poor soul who paid for his plate is left lonely. The conscience tries to raise its neck but the hammer of devaluation knocks it back to where it came from with that fierce blow, “it was only chicken change anyway”.
Some appear to be waiting for their obituary poster before gratitude comes within striking distance of their names. “With gratitude to God for a life well spent…”
Why wait for death before gratitude is embraced? There is so much to be grateful for. The devaluation of what we have will make us ingrates who take everything for granted. We are all guilty of complaining and apologising for our lives.
A question of where some people work is answered with an apologetic description of their “small job”. Whatever happened to the pride and dignity of labour? Not being satisfied with what one has will breed a chronic dissatisfaction. First, the job is hated, then, the boss, the car and finally what is seen in the mirror. We forget that function is superior to form. The shape of the nose is not important when anosmia strikes and there is neither taste nor a sense of smell. How about big ears that hear perfectly? Ask Beethoven what he would have chosen if given the option of perfect hearing or a perfectly formed pair of ears.
A working body should be valued for being alive and not needing refrigeration to stay fresh. The body might be hairy but it can still move to music. That is a plus!
Some people find it hard to value family and friends. It is all about “what is in it for me?” When the only term of engagement in a relationship is exploitation, then the one being exploited will never be great but just drained and frustrated. The lands in Africa being mined for resources know all about this. When the people of a land are not cared for, appreciated or valued, it is possible to drill in some section of their land and extract valuable resources for centuries with no thoughts about the peoples’ growth and development. The miners get rich and the inhabitants look on as they see their destinies fall to the ground in the similitude of rotten tomatoes.
Life is so much enjoyable when we value the things around us. As I am sitting down here in front of my laptop, typing and listening to ‘Ojuelegba’ by Wizkid, I am happy for the song that gives expression to my memories. I am grateful for my hearing, Wizkid’s vocals and YouTube being invented. Everything comes together and I am really feeling good tonight and thanking God for life.
Different things entertain and inspire each day so, one needs to increase the number of things one is appreciative of so that there is always something new to call a blessing each day. Everyday can really be a celebration as different people experience their peak and we share in their successes. Learning to enjoy and celebrate other people’s achievements can lift us all up. Is that not what we do when we dance to hit music? We celebrate the career success of the musicians as we dance. Success is contagious after all!
Now, back to people who specifically do things for us, we need to single them out for thanks. If we appreciate anything, that thing magnifies in our life. If we are grateful for one birthday card, our gratitude like a magnet attracts more of the same. The rich get richer because the cash in the wallet calls out to his brothers and sisters to come. I draw on my Christian faith as a compass when contemplating my own gratitude for what I have.
Jesus asked a question which is profound: “Were there not 10 cleansed?” This was after healing 10 village lepers who were the lowest of the low in those days when Leprosy had no cure. Only one came back to say “Thank You”. A mere 10 percent which is worse than the 20 per cent afforded by the Pareto Principle. How one does not say thank you after being healed of leprosy is a miracle in itself!
Pontificating led me to postulate nine reasons for the lepers’ ingratitude:
- Sense of entitlement
- A need to get a job. No time to waste saying thank you
- A need to self-vindicate against those haters that laughed at the hitherto diseased skin
- Short memory syndrome
- Unwillingness to acknowledge the source of good fortune. Sweep the embarrassing past under the carpet. Sudden shame of how one was
- Hurry to take back inheritance lost
- How do you like me now? Need to show off to distance oneself from the rags of leprosy
- Make up for lost time
- Suddenly a self-made man
The nine lepers were real ingrates but unfortunately, we have all behaved like them before!
